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....And I'd Give My Life For Yours.

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(2 Shovels Grabbed | Bury Me)

[06 May 2005|07:12pm]
I know one of you are bound to read this so.. here :..

I honestly dont have any intentions or Im not plotting some revenge.. i just dont care.. And some of the things you both said are truthful about me.. and give yourself a pat on the back for stating the obvious.. i know what my problems are.. and its really immature of the both of you to list them out like you both did.. did you read this whole thing? do you see me listing out both of your flaws? and stating the bad things about the two of you? No, because im not going to be an asshole about this.
I didnt drive past your house.. you know why?.. BECAUSE THIS ISNT ABOUT YOU.... i wouldnt do you the pleasure of driving past your house quite honestly.

I dont care what you write, or who you talk to.. or what lies you make up... or how you read my friends only entries.. so.. have fun doing it.

This is the last you will hear from me on this issue.. i have bigger and better things to worry about and to do than waste anymore time than i have to on the likes of the both of you.

(1 Shovels Grabbed | Bury Me)

[04 May 2005|01:12am]
amusing to say the least.

(1 Shovels Grabbed | Bury Me)

public.. cuz i know your pathetic. [31 Mar 2005|01:40am]
May 7th - Wednesday 13 @ I-Rock
June 28th - Sounds of the Underground @ Phoenix Amphlitheatre
August 4th - Ozzfest @ DTE


(2 Shovels Grabbed | Bury Me)

fuck [17 Nov 2004|04:35pm]
first off

Megan is my savior.. i swear to god she is (although that word will probably make her cringe)
I <3 Megan... your so special to me like you dont even know..

and... im about to publicly post.. so everyone... fuckin read it because its going to be beautiful..

right now.. its a good idea if no one pisses me off.. im on the brink of being really fuckin mad right now.

janelle = pissed off...

write it down.. take a picture.. copy and paste it... because im fucking mad...
now for the public post...

(5 Shovels Grabbed | Bury Me)

Metal Movement Show.. [18 Oct 2004|01:26am]
Well.... Kittie was on Saturday.. i got there at about 3:30 and as soon as i got there Morgan walked by and i said jokingly " omg! its morgan lander!!" and she smiled at me and then walked over to me explaining she didnt feel well and that she was going back on the bus cuz it was cold.. i motioned for her to go and shook my hand and told me she did remember me and thanked me for coming out to the show.. i also recieved a hug from mercedes. and i hooted at jenn *cat call* HOT MAMMA! and she turned and smiled and said hi lol <3.. shortly after i met up with Coogan and Anne, and two other people..(the girl Lisa looked alot like Trishelle from the Real World lol) and they were nice.. so then anne pissed out in the open.. there was a dildo juggling session.. i hit anne as hard as a could in the face with a dildo.. and then we saw Morgan and Mercedes parents.. also saw some other people i knew from the last kittie show.. steve.. liz..and the random guy with dreads... lol.... At like.. 5ish we were like freezing our balls off so Morgans Mom aka.. Momma Kittie lol (had to be there).. let us go inside to get warm.. we stayed there and the guy who works there that i always see told us that we had to go back in line because they were gonna open doors early.. i had no problem with this.. turns out.. ashley and kristen were out in line already so we all just walked up and met up with them.. then i saw this kid Rocky that i knew.. and deaths_rainbow walked past me lol...

as soon as i walk inside i notice they had Spit posters up (wtf?) so i was all about that cuz those are like 4 years old.. so i went down to the main floor and dicked around with the group for a bit and then went back and snagged two of those Spit posters... on my way.. im walking up the stairs and son of a bitch if i didnt see the vocalist for Crisis... and i love Crisis..so politely i asked her if she was busy and she said no.. and i told her how much i loved the band and all that and she asked me my name and then she signed my ticket for me and i was on my way.. i asked the guy at the door (one of the two asshole twins) if i could have some of the posters.. and he was like yeah take as many as you want we just throw that shita way anyways.. so i grab two.. and they were all still there so i didnt really think shit about it.. well Liz heard me talking about how i wanted one.. and i guess she went to get me one.. and i was already back at the floor.. she came up and told me that someone had taken all of them.. some girl took like everyone as soon as i did.. i was pleased that i got two.

then dude. the bands started.. well the shitty locals i mean... they all fuckin sucked.. between the opening bands and Level-C... i chatted with a couple people.. and i finally met dollwhore!!! lol last time i was at Kittie and she was there.. i never said anything and she was like in all my pictures.. she was really nice to me lol <3... and i hung out with Kelly.. now this bitch is absolutely the shit.. shes 30.. and i swear to god shes one of the best people ever... i <3 her... and i saw Billy from when i worked at mcdonalds.. and just talked to some other random people... Doug Podell from the WRIF came on right before Level-C did.. The singer of Level- C smiled when she saw me.. shes very nice.. that whole band is really nice.. they did the Pantera cover.. and pretty much had everyone pumped up for Crisis... Crisis took the stage and tore shit up.. i swear she grabbed my hand or pointed to me like.. 5 times and her long ass dreadlocks were everywhere.. it was great.. they had an awesome set.. then Otep came on.. (pig heads.. baby dolls....) was insanity.. she knelt down close enough for people to touch her and we all did of course and people were like trying to steal her jewlery lol.. obsession?.. i was really happy with Oteps set.. even though Jonestown Tea took like.. FOREVER.. and almost half of their set up.. otherwise.. they rocked.. the... the moment of truth...

Kittie.... Jenn and Lisa both were wearing thier black hoods and the black bandanas on there faces.. fucking badass..... and the set was so great.. Morgan was really workin the crowd..and jamming out.. everyone was singing and it was really great to finally see them after almost a year... Jenn freaked her bass and i swear half the men in the place wet themselves :) Jenns vocals were perfect.. Morgans vocals were perfect.. they played a great show.... i was really happy... then after the set Mercedes came to the edge of the stage grabbed everyones hands poured her water out and threw two setlists... i was kinda bummed cuz i wanted one.. but.. then... i saw Lisas setlist still on the speaker.. so i called to one of the security guards/stage people.. that i knew.. and i was like.. HEY... get me the setlist.. COME ON YOU KNOW ME! so i didnt think he would do it.. but he walked over to the speaker and as he did it this fat mexican kid with a mowhawk steps up to me like hes gonna try and get it from me.. so the guy walks over to me and im like begging him for it.. and he hands it down and i had to literally throw that kid off of me to get it.. but yes.. i did a setlist.. for the second show in a row... :) that made me really happy... and i had to get it the hard way..

i also took very good pics of all three headlining bands.. and coogan hooked me up with a postcard type deal of the metal movement logo on it with otep on the back.. its badass...

and that was my saturday..

jessica was being a annoying bitch on the way home.. she drove me all the way to 12 mile.. to drop off her stupid gothic 31 year old fuck buddy.. i was like.. dehydrated i hadnt drank anything with the exception of a sip of coogans water... all fucking day.. i ate.. a pack of fruit snacks all day.. and she made me wait an hour and a half drive and would not buy me a bottle of water for one fucking dollar.. she even stopped at a gas station for gas and refused.. shes being a whiney little bitch because her boytoy talked about music with me the whole time.. because we like the same bands.. and she likes justin timerblake and stupid shit like that... and she still acts like shes 16 god damned years old.. it makes me sick... i told her off basically.... she acts like in eternally in debt to her cuz she did me one favor in 6 years by taking me to a concert.. i thanked her repeatedly for taking me.. but apparently i have to like... do more than that? shes gay.. im not calling her.. she can call me.. since now she dont need me cuz shes so in to this guy she met..
okay tell me this
what normal person meets a guy ONLINE.. and the same day.. drives to his house.. and fucks him?
and shes done that with two guys in less than a month.. both online.. fucked them both. and they were both 31.....

other than her gayness.this weekened was awesome...

two and a half weeks until gwar....
rock and fuckin roll..

(2 Shovels Grabbed | Bury Me)

for you [27 Apr 2004|01:34am]
Silent Lucidity

Hush now, don't you cry
Wipe away the teardrop from your eye
You're lying safe in bed
It was all a bad dream
Spinning in your head
Your mind tricked you to feel the pain
Of someone close to you leaving the game of life
So here it is, another chance
Wide awake you face the day
Your dream is over... or has it just begun?

There's a place I like to hide
A doorway that I run through in the night
Relax child, you were there
But only didn't realize it and you were scared
It's a place where you will learn
To face your fears, retrace the years
And ride the whims of your mind
Commanding in another world
Suddenly you hear and see
This magic new dimension

I- will be watching over you
I- am gonna help you see it through
I- will protect you in the night
I- am smiling next to you, in Silent Lucidity

(Visualize your dream)
(Record it in the present tense)
(Put it into a permanent form)
(If you persist in your efforts)
(You can achieve dream control)
(Dream control)
(How's that then, better?)
(Hug me)

If you open your mind for me
You won't rely on open eyes to see
The walls you built within
Come tumbling down, and a new world will begin
Living twice at once you learn
You're safe from the pain in the dream domain
A soul set free to fly
A round trip journey in your head
Master of illusion, can you realize
Your dream's alive, you can be the guide but...

I- will be watching over you
I- am gonna help to see it through
I- will protect you in the night
I- am smiling next to you....

(2 Shovels Grabbed | Bury Me)

[26 Apr 2004|01:59am]

(Bury Me)

[08 Feb 2004|02:18am]
i got only a few things to say today

i will be attending:

Cannibal Corpse

and this one


thats gonna be the best fucking show on the fucking planet..

i love my krissy.. and fuck every single last one of you who say its "unhealthy".. and fuck that cunt who talked shit to her online today.. and fuck you if ur hacking into this and reading..because i may be morbidly obese... and i may fuckin have good relationships with people online.. but you... can just go fuck yourself mmkay? and dont go easy on yourself either.. really fuck the hell outta yourself.. cuz heres something you didnt know

i could give a fuck less about you..

oh whats that?
janelle dont give a fuck no more.

everyone who....well lets put it this way.. if i talk to you.. its all good.. if not.. dont bother.. cuz im a major bitch lately cuz i fucking hate immaturity.. especially online bullshit..

so yes... slipknot..and fear factory.. its like.. i can die in peace now..

krissy i looooooooooooooooooooove the hell outta you babe.. every last thing about you. and you are in every way the perfect friend. and in everyway the best person i coulda wished to get to know.
i love you in crazy amounts..

oh and i love the hell outta my terena.. shes got a girlfriend now.. im so happy for her!
so less of me and more of her girl.. but its all good..
love yah terena.. if u ever get online to read this.

im out this piece...

(2 Shovels Grabbed | Bury Me)

nice little public entry [14 Dec 2003|04:39pm]

by the way just in case you read this.. i know who you are.. and goodluck.. thats all i havet to see.

(1 Shovels Grabbed | Bury Me)

Crap..... [21 Oct 2001|12:32am]
Listen to the fuckin song. I sometimes wanna die. Hope everyone understands that......

(Bury Me)

I didnt write this....... [01 Jun 2001|08:32am]
I didnt write this but I liked it so here it is.

They say life is hard
But this isnt fair.
I needed a friend
And no one seemed to care.

I didnt have a real friend
For many years.
Crying didnt change that
No matter how many tears.

There was no one to ask
Why the tears didnt fall.
There was no one to ask
Why no one answered when I call.

I didnt have
Many reasons to live.
No one had tried all they could try.
No one had gave all they could give.

And then you came along.
You always knew what to say.
You said I was some kinda wonderful,
Sunshine on a cloudy day.

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